Andy Lang Books

Monday 28 September 2015

How to get banned by Amazon!!

It seems that to get banned from Amazon's Kindle Direct Publishing platform is very easy to do.

Here are the basic ingredients:

1. Open a KDP account and publish a few books.

2. Talk to a couple of local friends who also write.

3. Share some resources, internet connection etc.

4. Discuss with them just how difficult it is to get paid royalties if you live outside the US or UK.

5. Now this is the real trick to getting banned.... say, “Hey, I have a US bank account, why don't you get your royalties paid there, rather than rely on the East African Postal Service to deliver a worthless cheque. (That's if said cheque doesn't get lost or stolen before delivery).

6. Now this is where it gets interesting.... receive a high handed email from KDP stating that you have multiple accounts which is strictly forbidden, on pain of death, in KDP's terms and conditions, you are also banished forever to the hell that is epub, no debate, no discussion, no warning.

7. Reply to smug KDP contact, (who doesn't actually have the courage to disclose full name in the message, simply calling himself Michael A) Apologise, and plead if not total innocence, but a high degree of ignorance, and that you do not have multiple accounts, simply multiple users applying the same bank details.

8. Receive dismissive reply stating that KDP have several different criteria to apply while deciding such cases, and in your case.... go away, never contact us again... ever. Oh and by the way, you will never be permitted to publish through KDP ever again.

Now this got me wondering, Amazon is probably approaching the status of the worlds largest retailer, is it possible that they can sample DNA through my keyboard, they appear to be very sure that for all eternity, neither myself or anyone remotely contacted to me may use their publishing services!!

I guess when you are that big and powerful, why would you consider discussion, highlight an issue, and permit changes to be made? When you are that big and powerful... you can do whatever you want.

I suppose that the moral here is... Never do anyone a favour, (if Amazon is in the picture,) because you will be punished.

Having had my little moan about the draconian attitudes displayed, let me look forward with a little enthusiasm.

Traffik: The Stolen Girls remains a UK bestseller (on Amazon of all places – through my publishers Creativia).
And Gondell's Quest – Destiny is now published through Lulu and Createspace, (epub, mobi, pdf, paperback and hardback) and should be available very soon through B&N Nook, Kobo, Apple iTunes, Ingrams, and yes, even Kindle.

This epic fantasy rapidly turned into a saga. Reaching the 1200 page mark, and being not even remotely close to the end, I decided to split it into two parts, Book One – Destiny, and Book Two – The Legacy of Kalenzi, (out early next year). Now I will have two 750 page novels rather than one 1500 page, unprintable volume.

Gondell's Quest - Book One - Destiny.

Available now to download (epub) for $3.99 (link below) or if you want pdf or kindle versions, send me a message, we can work something out through paypal!
Print books are available from Lulu, Amazon, and Createspace.

Digest Edition (US Only)  $13.49
Support independent publishing: Buy this book on Lulu.

Paperback Edition. (Global)  $26.99

Ebook (Global)  $3.99
Support independent publishing: Buy this e-book on Lulu.

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